{"id":230,"date":"2014-01-22T13:18:14","date_gmt":"2014-01-22T13:18:14","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.decarl.com\/?p=230"},"modified":"2014-01-22T13:19:24","modified_gmt":"2014-01-22T13:19:24","slug":"50-shades-2","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.decarl.com\/?p=230","title":{"rendered":"50 Shades"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>He was in ecstasy, with a huge smile on his face, as his wife moved forwards, then backwards, forward, then backwards again &#8230;&#8230;. back and forth &#8230;.. back and forth &#8230;.. in and out &#8230;.. in and out.<\/p>\n<p>She could feel the sweat on her forehead and between her breasts, and trickling down the small of her back, she was getting near to the end.<\/p>\n<p>Her heart was pounding &#8230; her face was flushed &#8230; then she moaned, softly at first, then began to groan louder.<\/p>\n<p>Finally, totally exhausted, she let out an almighty scream and shouted,<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;OK, OK! I can&#8217;t park the fricking car! You do it, you SMUG cretin!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>He was in ecstasy, with a huge smile on his face, as his wife moved forwards, then backwards, forward, then backwards again &#8230;&#8230;. back and forth &#8230;.. back and forth &#8230;.. in and out &#8230;.. in and out. She could &hellip; <a href=\"https:\/\/www.decarl.com\/?p=230\">Continue reading <span class=\"meta-nav\">&rarr;<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[7,13],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-230","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-jokes","category-jokes-relations"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.decarl.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/230","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.decarl.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.decarl.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.decarl.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.decarl.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=230"}],"version-history":[{"count":4,"href":"https:\/\/www.decarl.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/230\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":233,"href":"https:\/\/www.decarl.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/230\/revisions\/233"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.decarl.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=230"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.decarl.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=230"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.decarl.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=230"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}